Healthy Boundaries, Healthy Relationships Video

For those of you who are following my series on healthy boundaries, I have created this video as a companion piece to the first article.  In this video, the concept of boundaries is explored and further defined.  You will also learn the difference between healthy boundaries and unhealthy ones, as well as to determine if your boundaries are too rigid or too loose.

Also, remember that the most important thing about boundaries is that they help keep you safe.  No one can set or enforce those boundaries but YOU.  Protect yourself -- LOVE yourself -- you deserve it!

November 2011 FREE Psychic Reading Giveaway

One of the ways that I've built up my clientele is through the word of other satisfied customers.  It always thrills me when someone says, "Oh, by the way, So-And-So recommended that I contact you."  Nothing gives me a warmer, happier feeling than knowing that I've helped someone so much that they want to share their positive experience with someone they care about.  

Another thing I love is seeing people coming to the blog and reading the stuff I've left for everyone.  So in the spirit of encouraging you all to spread the word, I've come up with a contest idea.  Here are the rules:

1.  To enter, simply advertise my website somewhere relevant on the internet, where I can see it to verify.  It can be anywhere, as long as you're not spamming.  It can be anywhere... some ideas include:  Tell your Twitter friends to come to my website, ConsultTheSage.Com, or to follow my Twitter account @YourPsychicSage.  Put my website on your Facebook wall.  Review my site on your blog.  Put a link on your website. If you belong to an online community of any type, recommend your friends come visit my site!  You get the idea.  As long as it's (a) verifiable, and (b) not spammy, it counts!

2.  Comment below with the location of the spot where you have promoted me, so that I can verify.  And make sure to give me a way to contact you in case you win!

3.  I will be offering two free readings: one voice reading (either by phone or Skype) and one e-mail reading (you can email me a question, and I will write you back).  Every promotion that you leave somewhere will count as one entry, so multiple promotions will result in multiple chances to win!

4.  Two winners will be drawn randomly.  The first prize winner gets to choose either the voice reading, or the email reading.  The second prize winner will receive the other reading (either voice or email, depending on what the first winner does not choose).

I can't wait to see who's spreading the word, AND how you're spreading it!  Good luck! :)

Healthy Boundaries, Healthy Relationships

Having strong but reasonable personal boundaries can be the cornerstone of having healthy, positive relationships with other people. Conversely, having unhealthy or weak boundaries can contribute to negative relationships. Through the creation of healthy and clear personal boundaries, we are establishing important parts of our identity and showing others what we're actually about. In order for this to happen, it's vital to understand what everyone needs, as well as what the rights and feelings are of everyone involved -- including yourself.

Everyone has a story. We all come from somewhere. While our backgrounds can be very different, it can be said that those of us who come from a dysfunctional environment often have less exposure to boundaries that are healthy and reasonable. Learning how to create and maintain healthy boundaries is a vital part of being a healthy, well-cetnered individual. Creating these boundaries begins with addressing other issues, such as cultivating a higher self-image and to combat apathy. We must learn how to recognize and address our own personal rights and needs. Another important step is to take care of ourselves, within the scope of our rights and what's best for us, especially in the context of interpersonal relationships. These things may take time to get just right, but over time, when we develop a healthier outlook for ourselves, our newly established boundaries will help to keep us safe and well-protected, possibly quite unlike our childhood experiences.

Are boundaries emotional? Or can they be tangible, like a fence in your backyard? The answer is both. Physical boundaries are defined by how close we allow someone to get to us, and by whom we allow to touch us physically, as well as where and under what circumstances we allow it. Boundaries of the emotional type have more to do with how we allow our feelings to be affected by others. Emotional boundaries center around our abilities to take responsibility for our own emotional needs, as well as allowing others to be responsible for their own. Our own boundaries will sometime challenge us, but they also define who we are and what we expect out of relationships. Can we refuse an unreasonable request that we're asked? Do we feel uncomfortable just by being around someone else who is feeling upset? Do our opinions change depending on the people whose company we keep? Do we take responsibility for others' feelings, going too far to please them, while neglecting our own needs? All of these issues will depend on whether or not our emotional boundaries are healthy.

Both sets of boundaries, our emotional and physical ones, determine how we behave toward and with other people, as well as how we allow them to behave toward us. If we did not have personal boundaries, other people would be able to do whatever they wanted with us: touch or treat our possessions or even our bodies in any way they wanted. Additionally, we would be obligated to take responsibility for other people's negative or inappropriate actions, to treat other people's problems as though they were our responsibility to prevent, address, or even solve. Basically, we would have no rights, and every aspect of our lives would be impossible for us to control.

While loose boundaries are often problematic, so are boundaries which are too tough or unyielding. People who live by strict and rigid personal boundaries are likely to push other people out of their lives. They will generally not ask for help when they need it, and they don't allow others inside. These people are often perceived as cold and emotionless, because they rarely display emotions or talk about how they might feel. On the flip side, people with overly loose boundaries will touch people inappropriately, even people that they may not know very well. Those with loose boundaries might have trouble telling the difference between sex and love, and they may get too close to other people much too quickly.

There are also people who have healthy boundaries. They tend to be the most well-balanced, and do much better with social interactions than those who have issues with their boundaries. While they are able to enjoy closeness with those who are special to them, and to accept help when they are truly in need of it, they also respect other people's rights, feelings, and positions. They also take responsibility for their own actions, and allow others to do the same. People with healthy boundaries are more able to compromise, to understand other people's feelings, and they generally have better self-esteem than those with unhealthy boundaries. Often, they are more comfortable with themselves, and also more able to make others feel good around them. Because they respect themselves and also the boundaries of other people, they can enjoy much richer and more fulfilling relationships with other people who respect their boundaries.

What about people who have boundaries that are less than healthy? Well, if yours need a bit of work, you can always improve them. While it may seem scary or uncomfortable at first when you start, remember that this is a vital part in taking care of yourself, and protecting yourself in a way that only you can do. Many people who grew up in dysfunctional, or even abusive, situations have developed survival skills which have hindered the development of healthy boundaries. For example, you may have trouble expressing anger, fear, or other unpleasant emotions, because it may not have been acceptable in the environment in which you were raised, even if the abusive actions of others were what caused the pain or anger. Therefore, in adulthood, it may be uncomfortable and difficult to construct healthy boundaries because of the past, however it is possible for you to work through those emotions and establish healthy boundaries to protect yourself. It won't happen overnight, and may take some time to get right, but it's never too late to start. And even small improvements can help you to live a happier, healhier, and richer life.

Quartz for Spiritual Clarity

You can find quartz crystals almost anywhere. Whether in the stone's natural form, a beautifully faceted crystal formed by nature, or even as the smooth tumbled and polished version, these stones are extremely potent as a tool for meditation, providing spiritual or physical healing, cleansing, and balance for the entire biomagnetic area of the body.

Quartz crystals are stabilizers and storer of electromagnetic forces naturally. In fact, it does this job so well, quartz crystal is an important component in various electronic mechanisms -- computers, TVs, radios, and even cell phones, all have parts made of quartz crystal. Without quartz, these tools would not be able to function.

The process by which crystals form is a slow and arduous one -- it began hundreds of millions of years ago, when water and quartz combined with the perfect blend of heat and pressure. Deep within the earth they grew in locations which had these very specfic balances. The locations of these deposits were actually vital in regulating the earth's electromagnetic polar energy. It has been argued by some that without these quartz crystal deposits, Earth -- and indeed, life as we know it -- may not have existed.

Quartz vibrates at a very specific rate, and although many don't realize this, the vibrations can be harnessed and transferred by the human brain. Many new-age schools of thought believe that by focusing our energies, we can transmit the force of these crystals to elicit healing powers to ourselves, as well as toward those around us.

While I always recommend that you receive advice from a licensed physician about any and all health issues that you may have, I also have to add -- adding crystals to a sensible health program, in addition to following your doctor's orders, certainly can't hurt, and might even boost your natural healing powers in conjunction with your doctor's medical treatment.

Under most normal conditions, our bodies have been created to heal themselves. All curative processes, whether traditional medical practices or alternative ideas, often include focus on relaxation and de-stressing so that it can do its job more readily. Crystals may help to provide a balance of energy to your body, in order to ease stress and unease while your more scientific health treatments are underway.

October 2011 FREE Psychic Reading Giveaway!

One of the ways that I've built up my clientele is through the word of other satisfied customers.  It always thrills me when someone says, "Oh, by the way, So-And-So recommended that I contact you."  Nothing gives me a warmer, happier feeling than knowing that I've helped someone so much that they want to share their positive experience with someone they care about.  

Another thing I love is seeing people coming to the blog and reading the stuff I've left for everyone.  So in the spirit of encouraging you all to spread the word, I've come up with a contest idea.  From now on, each month I'm going to offer 2 chances for my readers & friends to win a free reading!  Here are the rules:

1.  To enter, simply advertise my website somewhere relevant on the internet, where I can see it to verify.  It can be anywhere, as long as you're not spamming.  It can be anywhere... some ideas include:  Tell your Twitter friends to come to my website, ConsultTheSage.Com, or to follow my Twitter account @YourPsychicSage.  Put my website on your Facebook wall.  Review my site on your blog.  Put a link on your website. If you belong to an online community of any type, recommend your friends come visit my site!  You get the idea.  As long as it's (a) verifiable, and (b) not spammy, it counts!

2.  Comment below with the location of the spot where you have promoted me, so that I can verify.  And make sure to give me a way to contact you in case you win!

3.  I will be offering two free readings: one voice reading (either by phone or Skype) and one e-mail reading (you can email me a question, and I will write you back).  Every promotion that you leave somewhere will count as one entry, so multiple promotions will result in multiple chances to win!

4.  Two winners will be drawn randomly.  The first prize winner gets to choose either the voice reading, or the email reading.  The second prize winner will receive the other reading (either voice or email, depending on what the first winner does not choose).

I can't wait to see who's spreading the word, AND how you're spreading it!  Good luck! :)