The Importance of Doing Your Own Thing

One of the biggest issues that we have in our quests for self-love has got to be comparing ourselves to other people.

It's natural to seek some type of gauge by which to measure our progress.  When you look around and see your friends who have great jobs, wonderful families, more money, or lives that simply seem cooler than yours, it's hard to look at the bright side of your own life.  What's more, comparing yourself to those other people is going to invoke the monster of jealousy -- that that's a hard entity to control!

When assessing your own life, do so on your own terms.  Work according to your personal wishes, needs, and strengths.  Remember that while you may not have the tools that others have, they also don't possess what you have, either.

Also, while you're looking at all of the beautiful pictures and messages from your friends on Facebook or hearing amusing anecdotes at your next social gathering, it's important to keep in mind that people often put their best faces forward in those situations.  It may be due to excess pride, or the desire to simply not burden others with negative issues.  Either way, know that not everything is what it seems.

Live authentically and run your own life the way you enjoy running it -- do you own thing, measure your success by your own personal benchmarks, and don't worry so much about what the rest of the world is doing!

Spiritual Awakenings: Choosing to Work With the Divine

A conscious choice to work with the divine can also help in your quest for a spiritual awakening.  The wish, need, and desire to change are all vital parts of your quest.  However, you also need to combine those things with action.  We have already discussed what prompts the desire for change, but the time for action must come when the desire begins to move you in that direction. 

It is OK to give into the feelings that you are experiencing.  I often advise people to "go with the instinct," and never is this more true than during your journey along the path to a spiritual discovery.  You must let down your guard and become willing to take on the spiritual energy around you as you give back your own. 

This does not mean that you need to give up on yourself or your own abilities, preferrin g that your higher power does all the work for you while you're doing nothing.  It does mean that you must give up your negativity, your despair, and your pain that hinders your spiritual and emotional development.  Instead, you must replace these things with faith and action, which will lead to a higher awareness and a greater level of happiness for yourself. 

Allow yourself to heal, and let the universe play its part in your healing.

How to Deal with Negative People in 3 Easy Steps!

Everyone has to deal with negativity from time to time.  It's just part of life.  No matter what we do, who we are, or how we try -- at one point or another, we will all cross paths with someone who is negative.  It could be someone with whom you work, someone in your family, or even a friend that you truly care about:  the person may be pe

Step 1:  Consider the possibility of cutting them loose.  It might be a harsh choice, but if the bad outweighs the good that these people bring to your life, it may be time for an act of self-care by freeing yourself from the negativity of someone who is dragging you down.  If the negative person is draining your energy, causing you to dread scenarios where you know you'll need to deal with them, or putting you and others down, consider cutting the cord.  It needn't be dramatic or harsh, and it might be difficult as well.  But sometimes, you need to make your own sanity and wellbeing a priority!

Step 2:  Find ways to cope with their negativity.  There are probably a few emotional vampires that you can eliminate from your life entirely.  But there may be others, such as relatives that you have to see along with the ones you really want to see, or co-workers over whom you have no control, that you really need to interact with occasionally whether you want to or not.  Even if you don't have a choice in the matter of dealing with them, you can choose HOW to deal with them.  And that can actually make all the difference!  Try to accept them the way that they are.  Understand that a negative person is probably a miserable person, and remember that 90% of what they're griping about is definitely not personal.  This is just who they are, and their behavior is about them -- not you.  Take it all with a grain of salt and allow the whining to roll off of your back.  When you do have to deal with them, stay positive and upbeat; even negative people want to be treated with friendliness, and you might be surprised at how some of them can really be disarmed by a warm smile or a light friendly conversation.  Small talk can also serve as your barrier to some of the deeper complaints that they wish to share with others.  This really does work in many scenarios, so try it!

Step 3:  Seek positivity within their negativity.  While this might seem like a major oxymoron, it's actually not.  Many times, negative people are just unhappy souls who use their pessimism as a protective barrier to keep pain and rejection from penetrating their thin skins and wounding them.  It's also very possible that those with whom you are close, are also being negative or critical in an attempt to shield you from some danger or trouble that they perceive.  To them, their thoughts are real and their comments are used to defend and protect.  Analyze the situation and try to determine if the negative person is a downer about every subject in the world, or if they're especially prickly about only certain topics.  Remember that this need to protect, while strange, may also bring out some valid points for you to consider.  Those who are good at seeing potential problems and voicing those issues to you are actually trying to be helpful.  It might be that they care about you, or want what's best for everyone.  Whether their negative feelings have weight or not, seeing it from this perspective can help you to develop more tolerance as you understand better where it comes from.

Whether the intentions behind your "Debbie Downer" are positive or negative, it's important to understand that there's often a lot more going on than the surface of the situation shows.  If you're unable to remove the negative person from your life, ask yourself why they must stay.  And then, in order to remain positive yourself, use your optimism and positivity as tools to deal with the negative energy and words coming from this person.  At the end of the day, the only person that you have control over is yourself -- make the most of what you've got!

Am I a Lightworker? Lightworkers Characteristics for Self-Discovery

Are you a lightworker?  The term itself has been liberally applied in many scenarios, but not everyone is familiar with what lightwork actually entails.

If you feel as though you have a special calling to help, heal, or counsel other people, you can consider yourself to be a lightworker.  Having an open heart and a loving spirit are the first and most basic requirements for lightwork.  When we feel naturally compelled to open our hearts and to share our gifts with other people who are in need -- whether it's through the giving of money or material items, sharing advice, helping with small tasks, or even just a sympathetic ear and a hug -- we are performing a valuable service for one another, and in turn, for the universe.
Lightwork is about more than simply using new age methods to heal and help others.  It can manifest in very practical applications as well as more esoteric, spiritual ones.  When we have a look at the larger picture, we can understand that our calling to help other people is a calling for lightwork at its most basic spiritual level.

When you're compelled to be a loving and giving person, or called to help others, you are a lightworker!

Signs & Signals of a False Twin Flame

We're all looking for our soulmate, also known as a twin flame.  There are so many discussions about it online, in books, movies, and personal conversations.  Because of this, there is often a lot of confusion among people as to whether or not the "twin flame" that they're currently involved with is their true soulmate… as opposed to the false "twin flame."

Because our hopes and dreams hinge frequently on finding this person, we may sometimes come across people who seem too good to be true… false twin flames.  Here are some signs that, perhaps, the person who seems like they might be a true twin flame, is actually a false one.

Just as our twin flame has many similarities to us, so too will the false twin flame.  On a superficial level, this person may seem to be rather similar -- and sometimes, very similar, or complimentary to us.  They may share similar goals, backgrounds, values, or personal tastes.  However, with a false twin flame, the similarities may end there.

You true soulmate, or any person who loves you, will naturally want to be supportive of positive changes within your life.  The hallmark of a false twin flame is of duplicitousness.  If this person's behavior does not correspond to the love and care of your relationship, your feelings or personal well-being, then this person may not be exactly whom they seem to be.

Everyone has faults, flaws, and things about themselves that they'd like to repair.  However, sooner or later, most of us will come to terms with those issues as we mature.  Just as you are willing to sacrifice and improve yourself for the good of your relationship, so too should your soulmate be willing to do the same for you and your relationship.  A false twin flame may show a selfish streak, be unwilling to improve him- or herself, or exhibit a lack of care regarding your feelings or what's best for you as a couple.

A false twin flame will also take advantage of the other person in the relationship, be it financially, spiritually, sexually, or otherwise.  All the giving in the world is not enough for the false twin flame.  The false twin flame is left unfulfilled, as is the giver.  No one wins in a relationship like this.

While there may be a deep attraction between the two people, the giver may still feel a sense of anxiety or stress in the relationship.  The false twin flame may behave in ways that upset or depress the giver, whether these actions are conscious or not.  The false twin flame may deplete or sap the energy of the giver.  This is not a healthy relationship.

Upon a break between these two, the giver may come to realize exactly how much time and effort was expended into this relationship while the false twin flame did not truly experience the same connection.  Remember that many connections which are easily made, are also easily broken.  It is important to take an objective look at this relationship.  There are lessons to be learned from dealing with false twin flames as we evolve ever closer to the person we're supposed to be as we prepare to receive our true soulmate.