Bathing Ritual to Renew Your Spirit

I just came across this charming post at the simple-living blog "Down To Earth" which encouraged its readers to share a photograph and to explain a bit about it.

The one that I chose was this picture, which I'd recently taken and had been meaning to add to my blog for some time now.  This past year, I had recently discovered how wonderful it was to take a long, luxurious soak in the tub.  One of the awesomest things about taking a big ole' bath is that anyone can do it.  Doesn't matter if you're old, young, rich, or poor -- if you have access to a tub and some water, you can make it an amazingly sensual experience no matter what other accoutrements you choose to add.

There's a joke that goes something like, "You know you're ghetto when you break out your best dish detergent when it's time to take a bubble bath," but really, who cares?  It makes no difference if you bathe with a 3-for-99-cents bar of soap from the dollar tree or a pot of $140 Russian Amber shampoo by Philip B., you can make your tub time truly luxurious with only a few little additions.

I like to add a few candles on the edge of my tub; they need not be expensive (and if you can make your own candles out of leftovers and an old spaghetti jar, so much the better!) but they certainly can lend an air of tranquil pleasure to your bath.  You can even find an artificial candlelight generator app on your Android phone (if you're so blessed), which I've done more than once.  The one I have (which I downloaded for free) even gives you customizable flame colors -- purple flame, anyone?

And bubbles are nice, but not always necessary -- by the way, I recall a few times where my own mother broke out the Ivory or the Palmolive dish liquid when, as a child, I craved bubbles in my bath.  If it's not going to harm your skin, who really cares?  No shame in being creative.  These days, I save my pennies for the luxury of something special from the Lush store when I can get it (and use it carefully).  But even bubbles from your dollar store or local pharmacy will do the trick wonderfully.

You can also add specific herbs and items to your bath to cleanse your soul and enhance positivity.  A bit of rose oil or dropping in rose petals for love, some sea salt to purify your energy levels, lavender to relax, rosemary to energize, or a sachet of fresh or dried basil to attract prosperity and positivity... these can all replenish your spiritual energy and give you a whole new lease on life!

Some folks choose to do their entire beauty regimens in the bath -- shaving legs, deep conditioning hair, even wearing a facial masque while splashing away in the tub.  And some people bring a cocktail (or in my case, a nice cold can of soda) into the tub, sipping their cares away.  Or, you can just relax and allow your tension to melt away, enjoying the sights, sounds, and scents of your spiritual bathing experience.  The bottom line is that your bathtime rituals can be fully customizable and specifically tailored to your needs and wants.

So grab your rubber ducky, and your favorite towel, and enjoy!

Psychic Sage Forecast for June 2011

Aries:  This month, new information will lead to greater success with your work, but those who are close to you will be feeling neglected.  The end of the month brings "surprise" expenses... so you'll end up breaking even, except for the lessons you've learned!

LOVE DAYS: 1, 7, 11

MONEY DAYS: 2, 30

PERSONAL POWER DAY:  23

Taurus:  Try to stick close to home and go slow this month, and save your pennies for a rainy day.  Someone who you respect will be criticizing you for what they perceive as "laziness," but they don't know the whole story.  Be careful and take things one step at a time.

LOVE DAYS: 20, 29, 30

PROSPERITY DAYS: 5, 16, 25

POWER DAY:  14

Gemini:  You've been mired in feelings of nostalgia for the past: simpler times, moments of youthful enthusiasm and fun.  But the truth is, it's time for you to move on and live in the present.  Stop escaping from the conflicts at hand and delve into them.  This will be a struggle.  Hang in there!

LOVE DAYS: 12, 29

PROSPERITY DAYS:  18, 20, 28

POWER DAY:  13

Cancer:  The next few weeks will be full of possibility.  An endeavor that you've been working on will finally begin to turn in your favor, but only if you take control of the situation.  You will gain new insight about a difficult problem, which will give you new ideas about how to handle it.

LOVE DAYS:  2, 19, 24

PROSPERITY DAYS:  11, 28

POWER DAY:  19

Leo:  You're focused on some important projects this month.  The direction that your biggest priority will take is still unclear to you; you need to explore all avenues before making up your mind.  You're going to get much closer with someone who really interests you.  The end of the month will bring a calm after the storm.

LOVE DAYS:  3, 4, 18, 22

PROSPERITY DAYS:  15

POWER DAY:  22

Virgo:  There are hidden details surrounding something that has been worrying you.  Try to shake things up a bit this month by exploring new places -- whether it's a new coffee shop down the street, or a vacation somewhere truly exotic -- this will bring peace, companionship, and a whole new perspective to your life.  Keep your emotions in check; try not to let little things bother you this month.

LOVE DAY:  1

PROSPERITY DAYS:  16, 17, 24, 25

POWER DAY:  18

Libra:  Many responsibilities from your past are now coming to a "head" this month.  Seek advice from someone older and wiser who's been there before.  You will learn some new information which leads to a burst of creativity in resolving some of the issues at hand.  Go with your instincts!

LOVE DAYS:  14, 23, 25

PROSPERITY DAYS:  7, 28, 29

POWER DAY:  13

Scorpio:  May is going to be awesome for Scorpio!  Prosperity and love are both in the cards for you this month.  There will be some important action required of you as well.  Proceed with caution only at the beginning; as soon as you've figured out which actions to take, move swiftly.  Your instincts are right on point with the situation.

LOVE DAYS:  7 ,13, 21, 29

PROSPERITY DAYS:  21, 28

POWER DAY:  19

Sagittarius:  Your hopes have been high lately.  Some may say you're wearing rose-colored glasses, but don't let their dour viewpoints get to you.  People will be watching you carefully this month, but the opinions they form will be rash and filled with inaccuracies.  Don't be afraid to let others know how you feel. 

LOVE DAYS:  26, 21

PROSPERITY DAYS:  1, 2, 13

POWER DAY:  31

Capricorn:   You need to separate yourself from the crowd this month, and give yourself a bit of a break.  Other people's drama is stressing you out quite a lot.  Ordinarily it's good to resolve issues, but now is a better time to lay low and wait for the storm to pass.  Someone unexpected will defend you in the middle of the month.  Be sure to express thanks for it.

LOVE DAYS:  1, 6, 21

PROSPERITY DAYS:  12, 25

POWER DAY:  24

AQUARIUS:  Even though you'll be expected to play by some pretty strict rules thoughout May, you just won't be able to get ahead this month.  There will be quite a strain on you physically and financially within the coming weeks, but fortunately you can rely on your friends to keep your head on straight.  

LOVE DAYS:  18, 24, 30

PROSPERITY DAYS:  18

POWER DAY:  19, 22

PISCES:  You need to focus on yourself this month or else you will not be much good to anyone else.  You have some pretty lofty dreams right now and your creativity is high, so enjoy planning for the future.  Do not allow criticism to go to your head; the source of these negative words is actually jealousy and resentment which will be worked out when the time is right.

LOVE DAYS:  12, 21, 24

PROSPERITY DAYS:  1, 4, 28

POWER DAYS:  27

Psychic Forecast Video, June 2011

It's my first YouTube video!  I have predictions here for next month, a brief reading for each sign.  For your convenience, I have also predicted and included "Love Days," "Prosperity Days," and a "Personal Power Day" for every sign so that you can schedule all those important events. :)

I hope that you enjoy it!  Please subscribe to my channel 'cause I have lots of cool new things coming up. :)

New Artwork and a Big "Thank You"

I recently made myself an interesting new piece of artwork for my listings on Keen.com --

Don't you just love that adorable "moon bunny angel" watching over her city from above?

The building in the picture, by the way, is historical landmark 

the Cathedral of Learning in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

My husband and I have some happy memories of spending time there together.

As a child, I remember touring the rooms and admiring the breathtaking art and architecture!

The original picture was taken by the amazing Joey Gannon who has graciously allowed

others to use it under the Creative Commons share-alike license.

Joey, I thank you most sincerely for sharing your inspiring vision of this place that's brought me so many wonderful times, both as a child and as an adult!  I couldn't have made my ad without your contribution!

Friday the Thirteenth and Other Superstitions

Another Friday the Thirteenth is here once again, and with it has come awareness of superstitions and the supernatural. Friday the Thirteenth may be unlucky for some people, but I've always enjoyed it. I usually associate it with neither positive nor negative luck. However, it definitely is a day of mystical and unusual occurrences, either for good or bad. Make sure you keep a lucky charm on hand! Here are a few interesting myths and superstitions to remember for next Friday the Thirteenth, and for all year 'round.




1. Black cats are said to be inherently unlucky, however having one "cross your path" as you're walking is especially unlucky.


2. When you break a mirror, you will have seven years of bad luck. To reverse this back luck streak, you can bury the pieces of the mirror, or throw them into a stream.


3. "Step on a crack, break your mother's back." Avoid cracks in streets, sidewalks, and even the floor, as they are reputed to have unlucky consequences for you and those around you.
4. If a wild bird enters your house, someone close to you will die.


5. An old eastern European legend says that if you have accidentally put on your underwear inside out, you will have an especially lucky day. If you need a little extra luck on a particular day... go ahead and put it on inside out anyway... it couldn't hurt!


6. Opening an umbrella in the house is said to bring bad fortune to those inside the house, so keep those umbrellas closed unless you're outside.

7. When you move, do not take your old broom with you. Throw it away, and get a new broom for your new house.


8. If your palms itch, money will be changing hands -- your right palm itching indicates that you'll be receiving money; An itch on your left palm means that you will be lending or paying money to someone soon.


9. Horseshoes are good luck! If you hang one above the doorway, it will bring good luck to your household. In Ireland, it is believed that the horseshoe must be facing upward so that the luck "catches" in the curve of the horseshoe.


10. If you spill salt, you must throw some over your shoulder to prevent back luck from coming. Some say that it must be your left shoulder, other say that either shoulder will do.


11. When you sneeze, your soul might try to escape your body, or the devil may possess you. Therefore it's important to bless someone when you hear them sneeze.


12. If you see a shooting star, make a wish. All wishes that are made on shooting stars are said to come true. But if you tell your wish, it won't come true!


13. If thirteen people sit down to eat a meal together, then one of those people will die within a year.




Photos credits: Calendar pic (c) W. J. Pilsak; Kitty pic, thanks to DrL; 

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Lucky Charms "Bedroom Personality" Sex Quiz

This is an "oldie but goodie" that has been circulating on the internet since the mid-1990s.  I have always found it so entertaining, and was thrilled to come across it once again!  I hope that you all enjoy it!

Amazing new study shows that your favorite Lucky Charms marshmallow bit shape determines what you're like in bed! Yes, it's true--just take this simple test to determine your true bedroom personality:

Green clovers:

If your favorite Lucky Charms marshmallow shape is the green clover, you're a happy-go-lucky type in bed. You don't take anything too seriously in the bedroom or elsewhere and always manage to have a good time, even if you have someone else with you. You don't have any patience with depressed people and tend to sit on them until they cheer up.

Blue diamonds:

If your favorite marhmallow shape is the blue diamond, your thoughts in bed are mostly about what you'll get later. "If he really enjoys this, will he buy me that mink coat?" is probably what's going through your mind. People who like blue diamonds have a notebook of preprinted fill-in-the-blank palimony suit forms and are the people most likely to file their nails while making love.

Orange Stars:

If your favorite shape is the orange star, you expect to be the center of attention in bed. You expect your partner to spend most of his time pleasing you and when you do something for him, you expect enthusiastic moaning if not applause. People who like orange stars often have mirrors over their beds, not because they are turned on by watching what is being done, but because they want to be able to watch themselves having a good time. They often moan out their own names while making love.

Pink hearts:

If you like pink hearts, you're the romantic type. You like your partner to whisper romantic phrases into your ear and, if he's too distracted to form coherent phrases, you'll settle for romantic syllables. People who like pink hearts read most of the romance novels published and are turned on by people wearing armor.

Purple horseshoes:

If purple horseshoes are your thing, your tastes are modern, uninhibited, and somewhat warped. You like variety in the bedroom, especially when you can include handcuffs, chains, swingsets, and chocolate pudding. Be careful when going out on a picnic with anyone who likes purple horseshoes--she's likely to pin you down with croquet hoops when you're not looking and who knows what could happen next?

Yellow Moons:

If you're the yellow moon type, you're more interested in satisfying your partner's needs than your own. You prefer to lie back and wait for your partner to jump on you and express her needs verbally or nonverbally. People who like yellow moons usually own several pairs of handcuffs and other instruments of kinky sex just in case someone should ever want to tie them up and ravish them. Keep your eyes open for anyone who eats all the purple horseshoes out of her cereal as soon as she opens the box.

Those little oat bits that aren't marshmallows at all:

If you prefer the little oat bits, you probably don't like sex anyway and don't need to read this article. People who prefer the oat bits usually become accountants, librarians who work at the reference desk, or government employees; these people like to chow down on a big bowl brimming with oat bits before a tough day of protesting suggestive lyrics in rock music. People who like oat bits have more time to spend writing letters to the editor than any other type.

Floribus Magicis Ritem

The following is my very own magick spell which is used for dispelling negativity, purifying a space, and consecrating it with your own unique energy signature.  I call this simply, "Floribus Magicis Ritem," which means "The Magic Ritual of Flowers."

For this rite, you will need the following:

a handful of sea salt
your favorite incense
a handful of lilacs, or a few drops of lilac oil
a handful of carnations, or a few drops of carnation oil


Sprinkle the area with sea salt.  "By the power of Earth, I consecrate this space."
Take a moment to visualize the spirits of Earth bringing some of their holy energies to the area.

Dredge the area with smoke from your incense.  "By the power of Air, I purify this space."
visualize the Air spirits emanating from the smoke to make the space pure.

sprinkle the lilac oil or petals.  "By the power of water, I cleanse this space."
Envision the power of Water bring harmony and happiness to the area that you're sprinkling.

Sprinkle the carnation oil or petals.  "By the power of fire, I protect this space."
Imagine glowing Fire energies lending their protection to the area.

You are now ready to do your own magical workings, or simply leave these items as-is to keep your space consecrated and to dispel negative energies from encroaching.

Salt is a an age-old component of many spiritual workings.  Its main purpose is to cleans and purify a space, getting rid of negative vibrations before you prepare to do your own personal rites.  Lilacs, a water-ruled flower, are the perfect component to promote living in harmony, as well as to enhance mental and psychic abilities.  Carnations are a very classic fire-type flower, and is often used to promote healing, both physically and mentally, as well as to boost one's power and add extra "oomph!" to your magick.


Notes:  You can use essential oils (add a few drops to some olive oil), fragrance oil, perfume, or whatever you have on hand -- even fresh flowers or dried petals.  Use enough to cover the whole area.  A handful or 2 should be more than sufficient for most small areas.

I'm in love with this gorgeous lilac photo by 4nitsirk -- thanks so much for generously sharing it!

Mysteries of the Universe

A friend of mine sent me an email containing some pretty funny "mysteries of the universe" -- I thought it was really cute.  But, since I don't forward things to other people (I just hate clogging up others' inboxes!), I figured I would share it on my blog.  We may never solve some of these esoteric riddles of life... But in the meantime, I hope that at least a few of these will give you all a chuckle or two!

If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?

Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them? 

Can you make a candle out of your earwax?

When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?

Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?

"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?

Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?

Are marbles made of marble? 

Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?

If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived)

Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

Can you get cornered in a round room? 

Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?

Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?

If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?

How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?

Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?

Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse? 

Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?

Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable? 

"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear??

Why is it that when you get out of a swimming pool, your urine is hotter when you use the restroom?

Can mute people burp?

What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave popcorn?

Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with?

How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play?

If a fork were made of gold would it still be considered silverware?

If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?

Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?

Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa 

beans, and all beans are a vegetable?

Do they have girl’s bathrooms in gay bars?

Why is toilet bowl cleaning liquid only blue?

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

Why do you go “back and forth” to town if you really must go forth before you go back?

Why doos shaped macaroni taste better than the normal kind?

Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?

Why can't you get a tan on your palms?

If your sick for one week and on one of those days they had to cancel school because of snow, do you have to make up that day in June?

Why do dogs sniff other dog’s bottoms to say hello, why don’t they just bark in their face or something?

Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been 

free?

If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it? 

You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to 

people that work nights?

Why do you get in trouble for blocking an exit when you're standing in the doorway? In case of an emergency, wouldn't you run out, too, therefore NOT blocking the exit? 

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Why is a square meal served on round plates?

Why is the 0 on a phone after 1 and not before 1?

Which way does a compass point in space? 

Why are people allowed to put naked statues outside but why can't we run outside naked?

Why do all superheroes wear spandex?

If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?

Why did Mary own a little lamb?

If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?

Why can’t a baby cry while it’s inside its mother?

If the president were gay, would his husband be the first man?

If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish" what would you do?

Why are Pringles curved?

What happens if your snot freezes in your nose?

Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?

If overalls are held up by the snaps at the top, then why do they have belt loops?

Why is it that its good to score under par in golf but its bad to be “under par” in any thing else?

Is Jerry Garcia grateful to be dead?

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

Can bald men get lice?? 

How come popcorn isn't a vegetable? 

Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene?

Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?

Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?

Why is snow white and ice clear? Aren't they just different forms of water?

Why do they put the names of football teams on baseball caps?

If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license?

How come you pay an extra 25 cents to get something put on your hamburger but they don't take off the price if you get something taken off?

Can you get cornered in a round room?

Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?

Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?

If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?

"How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?"

Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?

If you were under house arrest and you lived in a mobile home, wouldn’t you be able to go anywhere you want?

If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?

What would happen if you were to feed a pig some bacon?

* If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?

Do pyromaniacs wear blazers?

If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?

How come only car keys are the only keys with teeth on both sides?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas?

When something's funny why is it called a "knee-slapper" when you actually slap your thigh?

Why is it that when babies are born they only weigh like 7 lbs yet the mom weighs 30 lbs more?

Since a running back runs forward, why is he called a running back?

If you die and you have a broken leg do they take the cast off?

Is sign language the same in languages other than English?

Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number?

Why do they call the small candy bars the "fun sizes"? Wouldn't be more fun to

eat a big one?

Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work?

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?

Who gets to keep the pennies in a wishing well?

If you went back in time and killed your mother would you disappear the moment you killed her?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?

If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Do the air bubbles that are created when you fart in water, smell when they pop?

When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do you call a girl that is named after her mother?

Just what was the "Baby On Board" sign for? Did it help us decide which car not to

hit in case of an accident?

Does Hawaiian Punch come from Hawaii?

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

Can you cry under water?

If all of the Acme stuff doesn't work, why does Wile Coyote keep buying their products? 

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that ? 

Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do? 

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your

thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going too ? 

Why do people call it an ATM machine, but they know it's really saying Automated Teller Machine Machine? 

Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number?

Why is Christmas colors red and green when Santa's suit is red and white? 

Why do you DELETE something on the computer, but ERASE something on paper? 

Since there is a rule that states "i" before "e" except after "c", wouldn't "science" be spelled wrong?

If the S.W.A.T team comes to your house and breaks down your door, do they replace it later? 

If the handicapped bathrooms are for people who cant walk why do they put

them at the end of the bathrooms ?

Why is it that on the back of a medicine bottle it says "adult" is 12 and above, but the adult age in reality is 18? 

Why do most people put more effort into their wedding than their actual marriage? 

Why do dogs walk around in circles before lying down? 

Can a metal plate in your head get rusted?

Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves? 

If the day before a holiday is called Christmas Eve, is the day after Christmas Adam? 

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? 

How come you can kill a deer and put it on your wall but it's illegal to keep them as a pet?

What do vegetarians feed their dogs? 

Can someone give up lent for lent?

Why would Dodge make a car called Ram?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

Why is it when we duck they call us chicken?

Why is there a size 12-14, 14-16, 16-18, and so forth, but no 13, 15, and 17?

What did cured ham actually have?

If CD’s were spun in the opposite direction, would it say everything backwards?

If lava melts rock, wouldn’t the lava melt the volcano?

If a man has no fingers, can he press charges?

Can a blind man see his future?

Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box? 

Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day?

Can you write in pencil on an eraser?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that when we are humming and then we plug our nose, our humming stops? Do people really hum through their nose, or their mouths?

Can you blow a balloon up under water?

Can crop circles be square?

How do they get the air inside the bubble wrap?

Why are there black lines on a basketball?

Does it really count in court when an atheist is sworn in under oath using a Bible?

Why are there pictures of the sun wearing sunglasses when the purpose of sunglasses is to protect your eyes from the sun?

If you were born exactly on 12:00 midnight on December 31st – January 1st, which year would you say you were born in?

If marriage means you fell in love, does divorce mean you climbed out?

Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed?

When a car is for sale and it has a balloon on it, does the balloon come with it?

If you are parking somewhere and the signs in front of the parked cars say "30 minutes" then when your 30 minutes are up can you park in the spot right next to you??

Why isn't the word 'gullible' in the dictionary?

When you see the weather report and it says "partly cloudy" and then the next day it says "partly sunny"; what’s the difference?

Can a person choke and die on a life savor?

Why are women and men's shoe sizes different? 

What happens when you say “hi” to your friend on an airplane who's name is Jack?

If you took a compass to outer space would it still point "magnetic north"? Is there still a north, south, east, and west in space? 

Why is it illegal to put money in other people's parking meters? 

Do people with big eyes see at a wider range than people with smaller eyes?

Do you ever notice those red balls on the wires while your driving? Well what are they for?

Why do people who don’t want to go to hell bury themselves 6 ft. closer? 

Why is the St. Louis baseball team the cardinals, but the Missouri state bird is the blue bird?

Why are public toilet seats never complete ovals?

If we had a president that was a woman, would her husband be the first man?

Why do we have to wait till the water starts boiling before we can put

pasta into the water?

If a criminal turns himself in shouldn't he get the reward money? 

Why are blue Christmas lights so popular? Aren't red and green the 

traditional colors?

Why do police officers wear tight clothes and dressy shoes? wouldn't that make them slower when chasing someone?

If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

Why do birds bob their heads when they walk?

Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill? 

How come wine and hard liquor doesn't come in cans, but beer does?

When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?

If people say if you eat dessert before dinner it will ruin your appetite won’t eating dinner before dessert ruin your appetite for dessert?

Why do they call him a Skipper when he just stands there?

Why does "lake" come first (Lake Michigan) and "river" come second (Mississippi River)?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? 

If I raise the volume on my radio, does it use more electricity?

What would happen if: Everyone was to flush their toilet at the same time?

Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on?

If you died on the International Dateline, and half of you were on 1 side and the other half on the other side, what day would you die?

If someone crashes his or her car on purpose, why is it still a car accident?

If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price?

If the weather man says "it's a 50% chance of rain" does that mean he has no idea if its going to rain or not? 

If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?

If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church?

When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand?

Why are you IN a movie, but your ON TV?

Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn’t they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars 

to look at things on the ground?

What is the parking situation like at the Special Olympics?

If the police see some one committing a crime but are on there way to investigate a crime do they stop or go to the one they were on their way to?

Seeing as cupid is so good at matchmaking, does he have a girlfriend?

Is an alcoholic just a drunk that's scared of a hangover?

If shampoo comes in so many colors, why is the lather on your head always

white?

If a table is propped up can it be propped down?

If our planet is inhabited with creatures made by God...is it possible that there's another planet inhabited with creatures made by the Devil?

Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza?

How come, in the Mini Wheat’s commercials, Sweets has a Brooklyn accent and Wheat’s has an English accent? They're attached at the back, wouldn't they have been raised in the same place?

Why do people, such as S.W.A.T or Seals wear the bulletproof vests where you can see them? Wouldn’t people aim for their head or crotch?

If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?

How come stealing from one book is plagiarism, but stealing from many is research?

Can you fart and burp at the same time?

How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

Have you ever heard of a raisin that is not dry?

If two identical twin brothers married identical twin sisters, would there kids be identical?

If your glove is too big, does it still fit like a glove?

Is it possible to scream at the bottom of your lungs?

Since you have to pull over when you see a funeral coming down the

road...what would you do if there were a funeral coming down both sides?

If you can test drive cars at the dealer's, why not test-drive lawnmowers 

around at a hardware store?

Is there anything easier done than said?

Is it possible for a narcoleptic to have insomnia?

Since the U.S. says United We Stand, does that offend legless people? 

If no one buys a ticket to a movie, does the movie still play?

Are you able to fart in heaven?

Why isn't sour cream really sour?

Do they re-use body bags? Or do they throw them away and get new ones? The people using them wouldn’t care anyway?

Why isn’t the Q or the Z included on the phone

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway?

If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

Do ducks sneeze?

Why is that when fish die in water, they float to the top, but when humans die in water, they sink to the bottom?

Don’t you find it weird we teach our kids: scrub a dub dub, three men in a tub?

Why do they call it "morning sickness" in the middle of the afternoon? 

Did you know there is a page 666 in The Bible?

If money is the root of all evil then how come churches ask for it? 

Can vampires donate blood?

If a fire truck was on its way to a fire and it passes another fire, which fire would it go to?

If you could walk through the walls, wouldn’t you fall through the floor?

How come when you go in the front door of a church, you are at the back of the church, and if you go in the back door, you would end up in the front of the church?

If your named Will and you are in the army do you get worried when people say fire at will?

Why is there an L in NOEL?

If you eat regular rice crispies with chocolate milk will it taste the same as eating co-co crispies with regular milk?

Why is Bra singular and Panties plural?

What are those little things on the end of your shoelaces called?

When you open a new bag of cotton balls, are you supposed to throw the top one away?

If they develop a supersonic train, will they give it a whistle? 

Do fish ever get thirsty?

Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?

If there were a knowledge contest, would the female winner be called Miss Informed?

If you stick on stickers on non-stick pans, would they stick on?

Why don't ducks duck when you shoot at them?

On a hamburger bun, why is the top bun always bigger than the bottom one?

Why does breaking a mirror mean seven years of bad luck when seven is a lucky number??

Can angels eat devils food cake?

If I think, and therefore I am, am I just a thought?

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?

Why do the numbers on the phone go one way, but the numbers on the calculator go the other way?

Why do we tie shoes to the back of a car for newly weds?

Is it possible to do stand-up comedy sitting down?

Is bad a bad word?

If dinosaurs had sores.........what would they be called?

What does the T in T-Shirt really mean?

Why does the label on children’s Tylenol tell you not to operate heavy machinery or vehicles when it's for CHILDREN!?

Why do they call front seat shotgun?

Why are all farms red? 

Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?

Why is there not a Channel 1 on TV?

Why are there dents in a golf ball?

Why are the obituaries found in the "living" section of the newspaper?

How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?

When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'. Coincidence? I think not?

What would happen if u put a humidifier and a dehumdifier in the same room?

Are one handed people offended when police tell them to put their hands up?

If you built a time machine with all new parts, when you went back would the parts you use dissapear because they didn't exist then?

How can sweet and sour sauce be sweet and sour at the same time?

Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars

Did Noah keep his bees in archives?

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words worth?

If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?

If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?

What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?

What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

What do mermaids eat?

If your plan is having no plan, do you have a plan?

If the energizer bunny attacks someone, is he charged with battery?

If anything's possible, then is it possible that nothing's possible?

Is atheism is a non-prophet organization?

If a baseball is hit out of the stadium, travels completely around the world, re-enters the stadium, and is caught by a fielder, is it a home run or an out?

If a policecar, an ambulance, a fire truck and a mail truck are all at a 4 way stop who has the right away? 

Why are all farms red?

why are rubber duckies yellow when most real ducks aren't?

Are there female leprechauns?

Do judges and lawyers do jury duty?

Do fish sleep?

Would it be possible for a solar car to travel faster then the speed of light?

Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?

Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?

On a telephone, why does ABC start on the number 2 and not 1?

Do pigs pull ham strings?

Do dumped farmers get John Deere letters?

Why do radio operators say "niner" instead of just "nine"?

Why do people say heads up when you should duck?

Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?

Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?

Why do they call the clock where you punch your time card called a "time" clock? Aren't all clocks "time" clocks?

Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when we describe something being crap?

Can dogs have dog days?

When a male is elected president and his wife is called the First Lady. What would a lady's husband be called if she were elected president?

If you are born on February 29 of a leap year, when is your birthday? 

Do birds pee?

Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?

Why do they call it 2% milk, if its 2% fat, not milk?

What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?

If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see?

Have you ever thought what life would be like if your name was Anonymous? You'd get credit for everything nobody wanted credit for?

If a water spins clockwise when it drains in the northern hemisphere, and water spins counterclockwise when it drains in the southern hemisphere...which way does it spin at the equator?

If you own a piece of land and there is an volcano on it and it ruins a

nearby town, do you have to pay for the property damage?

If you have x-ray vision, and you can see through anything, wouldn't you see through everything and actually see nothing?

If it is a 50 mph per hour wind and you drive your car at 50mph downwind, if you stick your head outside would you feel the wind?

Why does "closing up" a shop and "closing down" a shop mean the same thing?

Why do they call them "Animal Crackers" when there not even crackers...they're cookies?

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

How do you throw away a garbage can? 

Why in baseball is it called the World Series if it is only played in the U.S.A & Canada?

Why do old men have hair in their ears? 

Why are things typed up but written down?

Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?

In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end?

If you were on a plane going the speed of sound and walked from the back of the plane to the front, would you be walking faster than the speed of sound?

If the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

What does OK actually mean?

what does the K in K-mart actually stand for?

Why do we feel blue? and what color does a smurf feel when they are down?

Why can't you eat pancakes for dinner?

Why do donuts have holes?

Why don't you hear thunder with heat lightning?

Do the different "M&M's"® colors taste different?

If your born at exactly midnight is your birthday on both those days?

If you're caught "between a rock and a hard place", is the rock not hard?

If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles?

Why is it you can walk down a road, even if it goes uphill?

Why do we say "bye bye" but not "hi hi"?

Can blind people be dyslexic when they read Braille?

How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

Why do the call the angel of death an angel if all it does is bring pain and suffering?

Why doesn't the glue in the bottle dry up? 

If Luke took a bath, would the water be lukewarm?

If an anarchist group attained political power, would they by principle have to dissolve their own government?

If you decide that you're indecisive, which one are you?

Why is it we have the weight of the world on our shoulders but have to get it off our chests?

Why does everyone speak different languages and have different accents if we all originally came from the same place?

Why do they call it a RUNNING BACK when he is running forward?

If you tell someone they are being judgmental aren't you being judgmental yourself?

Why do they call it your "bottom", when it's really in the middle of your body?

How come no matter what color the liquid is the froth is always white?

Why do British people never sound British when they sing?

Why do they call them guidance counselors when all counselors do is offer guidance?

Why do they call it "head over heels in love" If our head is always over our heels?

Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in the Car Pool lane?

Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?

If someone can't see, they're blind and if someone cant hear, they're deaf, so what do you call people who can't smell?

How do they get those boats in those glass bottles?

Why would superman want to leap over the tallest building in a single bound if he can fly?

Why is it called a TV set when there is only one?

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? 

How did the headless horseman know where he was going?

Why do they call it an escalator if it takes you down?

Why is it called football when you hardly use your feet?

How come some Little Debbie snack cakes come in a twin pack and others are wrapped individually?

Do cows drink milk?

Can a guy named Nick have a 'nick'name?

If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?

Since we see little birdies when we just get knocked out, what do little birdies see when they just get knocked out??

What is a male ladybug called?

Photo credit: Thanks to pauly for the amazingly beautiful night sky picture! :)